Meet Boris, a red wattle pig, weighing 1201 lbs. and guarding one of the entrances to the Texas State Fair. He doesn't say much. Doesn't do much. I barely got a snort out of him.
A nearby sign listed Boris' acrobatic tricks as being:
-smiling and waving with his ears
-wagging his tail with excitement
-sleeping for long periods of time
-eating 20 lbs. of feed per day
-and oinking when he feels like it